A Couple o' Nuts We'd sooner turn to C-SPAN and flog the bishop while watching some crotchety Southern Senator babble on about the effects of strip mining on lower-Appalachian Valley Oak Bark Moths. Really now... making this website was a waste of webspace and we're now bitter and resentful for having used up precious minutes of our lives we'll never get back clicking on it.
A Handful o' Nuts Occasionally, in and around this website, we found ourselves sporting a stiffy. The effort was there, but the models looked like they fell outta the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down. We'd probably be able to bust a nut looking at this site were we stranded on a deserted island with no other company than rabid, horny jungle apes that chase us around trying to sodomize us with bananas day and night... a thought that in itself occasionally makes us sport a stiffy but that's really a whole different issue altogether and quite frankly none of your business.
A Bunch o' Nuts Definitely some jerk off material here. A good portion of the material was certainly ok. Action was pretty good. Sex was pretty steamy. It showed a good deal of promise, but kinda left us wanting more towards the end. Brought us to the brink, but not quite over the edge. Like... ya know how you're gettin' some pretty decent head and all you need is for your blowjob buddy to jam a finger up your tuckus to really push you over the top and give you a volcanic orgasm? So close... yet not quite there? Right?! Can I get an "AMEN!"?!?! ... Guys? Helloooo?
A Lot o' Nuts Oh yeah! Keep it comin'! Definitely oh so worth it! Hot like WHOA! A right good porn site, my fellow porn purveyor patron partisan partners! We'd go there again... and again... and again! We laughed! We cried! We came! We recommended it to our friends. This one's definitely a keeper. Forget the tissue paper. This one calls for the super absorbent industrial strength paper towels.
The Golden Nut! We'd trade or own mother for a chance to visit this porn site again! When we typed in the URL, angels sang in the distance and a golden brilliance filled the room. This site has contributed to more of our orgasms than the stinky sock we had hidden under our bed all throughout high school and affectionately called "Crusty". Everyone involved in the production of this website should get a statue made in their likeness. When we fail to update JuicyGoo for a week or two? It's most likely because we're locked away in the screening room surfing through this site.